Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Late night during Christmas Break

It is late at night and my family is all asleep. I am on a crazy schedule where I am staying up late and sleeping late. It is fine for now, but soon I will have to get back to school. I have not written in my blog lately. It seems like when I get busy with my everyday life, I don't have time to stop and put down my thoughts. But tonight I am doing a lot of thinking. I have been in a Melancholy mood after the holidays. I LOVE Christmas and this year we had an incredible time with my family. I couldn't have asked for a better few days, but now it is time to get organized for the new year. It is time to clean out the old and look forward to what the new year will bring. That is what we have been working on today. The kids have been cleaning out their rooms and Steve was working on the playroom and I was focused on laundry and going through all our clothes. I would like to start 2010 on an organized note.

But I am not thinking about that tonight. Tonight I am thinking about dreams. I am reading a book by Shelia Walsh called God has a Dream for Your Life. It is a excellent book and it is making me look at my dreams for my life and more importantly God's dream for my life. The first part of the book is all about freedom. Am I living a life that is free in Christ? It is a really good question and one that I had not looked at before. Do I live like I am really free? What does that look like? How do you like out your freedom in Christ?

I don't have the answers to these questions. But they are good questions to ask ourselves.

I am realizing more and more that God's dream for my life is not about what I do but more about who I am...His dream for me is an incredible relationship with Him. The creator of the universe wants to have a relationship with me. I have to pause as I write those words...because if you really think about them, they don't make any sense. He knows all about me...everything I have done, everything I have said, everything I have thought...and he wants to know Me! WOW! That is where the freedom is found...

What else can there be? God is pursuing me, he is seeking after me...He listens to me and responds. He is God and He wants good things for me. I want to be worthy of that love and that relationship. But the beautiful thing is that I don't have to earn it. I want to live a life that is pleasing and worthy of him but that is very different than trying to earn His love and his relationship.

I want 2010 to be that year. The year of freedom and rest in my relationship with the Father. I want to lay aside the things that distract me and entangle me and I want to focus on Him. I want to seek His face. I want to sit at His feet and listen to the dreams He has for me. I want 2010 to be the beginning of a new freedom in Christ. a relationship that spills out into every part of my life. Not a checklist of do's and dont's...not a new Bible study or a new program...but a relationship, with God. He created me and then He bought me for a great price and if that's not enough...He wants to spend time with me.

Freedom...God given life...bought and paid for...all that's left is to live!

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